Runaway Lane ...

Originally Published on February 3, 2020

In these past weeks, Paul and I have traveled the highways of British Columbia doing what he always does as a winter road warrior. So many times along the downhills we'd see these. The Runaway Lane. I'm sure you've seen them in your travels. Those lanes that run off the downhill to a steep incline so trucks and semi-trailers can slow and stop themselves should they lose their brakes on the mountain descent.

Seeing so many of them got me thinking. In life, at times, I think we all need a runaway lane. Don't you?

Life can get overwhelming and stressful. We can really get lost in all the demands of family, work, and all the circumstances of life (illness, death, job loss, teenagers, you name it). When this happens it can feel like our world is out of control. We are a blur. Going through the motions just to get things done; losing ourselves. We feel lost and out of control. Often, we don't even know it's happening, until all of a sudden, we feel like we are on a downhill descent without any brakes, and we need a Runaway Lane before we crash and burn.

This happens to me, and I know it happens to you too. That's life. So how do we become more aware of ourselves, and what's happening around us? How do we learn to put the brakes on sooner, slow when we need to, and take the Runaway Lane when we need to get off the highway?

For me, there are some simple tips. Pay attention to what's happening within your body. Is it in your gut that you feel the tension? your upper chest? your head? Don't ignore these feelings. It's your body's way of saying "Slow down, pay attention". Take a break, it's time to adjust.

When you notice these feelings, it's time to stop and consider what is and isn't working for you at the moment. What do and don't you have control over? For me this is big. If you don't have control over something or someone, you cannot change it. So, you must look for ways to change your perspective, find acceptance in what is, and be realistic about what you can and cannot do. Often we feel we must do everything, and then wonder why we crash and burn ourselves out. We must not, and cannot do everything. No one can. Sometimes we must ask for help. Oftentimes we must learn to say "no". Always, we must listen to our bodies, our compass.

So ... slow down. Stop. Take the Runaway Lane; and then ...

Breathe. Mediation, yoga, journaling, or simply being alone with yourself and your favourite cuppa. Dig deep, the answers are always within us. Create the awareness you need. Assess the situation. Get real with yourself and your emotions. Get to your truth in the circumstances.

Get clear on what you do and don't have control over. Find a path to acceptance and set an ongoing plan. Ask for help. Say "no". As Byron Katies says, "Love what is". When we can get to this place, life is easier. There is much more joy, and less overwhelm - even in the really tough stuff. Trust me, I know.

This work takes time, and an ongoing commitment to yourself to make a long-term change. It is this work which moves from reactive to proactive, in all things. This is about a consistent practice that keeps you centered and aligned no matter what circumstances life gives you. This is the greatest gift you can give yourself in all areas of your life.

After almost 4 weeks on the road, facing the increasing limitations of Paul's health, and my excessive anxiety with winter driving, we experienced many unexpected and hard surprises on this journey. Yet, on the last night of our trip, as we were enjoying dinner of delicious steak and coconut prawns, Paul with his Arnold Palmer, and me with a lovely glass of red; we clinked our glasses and said "Cheers". Followed by both of us saying, "We are so lucky - even with a bad set of lungs. We are so lucky, so blessed!"

With the ability to slow down, assess, and determine what I have control over - and more importantly, what I don't, get real with my own emotions and simply say "Love what is", my view of life has changed. Sometimes I still need the Runaway Lane, but simply to slow down. I know I will no longer crash and burn.

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About the author:

Karen Hendrickson is an Elevation Coach, focused on helping others to rewrite their life story, befriend their mortality, and find the richness and magic that lives at the intersection of our lives where life and death meet. When we allow our authentic self permission to shine our life becomes full of MAGIC and GREATNESS.  Contact karenttjourney@gmail.com and start working with her today!